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Behind the Curtain #3

What do we get discouraged about?

A new role opens, we recognise the opportunity, and we assume someone inside the business may be ready to step into it. Then an external hire is announced, someone new arrives above us, beside us, or into a position we hoped could become a pathway forward. In startups and small teams, where growth opportunities are fewer and visibility is higher, these moments can feel especially personal.

Part of the frustration is not only about the role itself; it can feel as though loyalty has gone unnoticed, or that the effort we have invested is not being recognised. In smaller organisations, we wonder why an external recruitment process was needed at all. If someone internal seems ready, a direct promotion can feel more natural, faster, and more justified than opening the search to outsiders.

The question becomes: why would an employer hire externally instead of developing the people already committed to the business?

What is sometimes happening underneath the decision?

Sometimes organisations do underinvest in internal development; they fail to coach, plan succession, or create clear growth pathways. That does happen. But often, external hiring is driven by pressures that are less visible from inside the team. A company may need skills it does not currently have, experience at a level no one has yet reached internally, or speed that internal development cannot provide in the short term. A founder may need someone who has already solved a problem the business is only now encountering.

In small companies especially, one hire can significantly change outcomes. Leaders often balance loyalty to existing employees with the immediate needs of growth, investors, customers, and execution risk. Sometimes that balance is handled poorly; other times, it is a genuine attempt to strengthen the business in a way that later creates more opportunity for everyone.

From our position, we may see replacement or rejection. From theirs, they may see a capability gap that needs to be solved quickly.

How do we respond when this happens?

When an external hire is made, most of us do one of three things. We assume we were overlooked. We disengage quietly. Or we compare ourselves constantly to the new person and grow resentful. All three usually reduce clarity and slow our own progress.

Here’s the shift: instead of asking only, “Why not me?” we may need to ask, “What capability did the business believe it needed here, and how can I understand that gap?”

We might say, “I’d value feedback on what experience was most important for this role.” Or, “What would I need to demonstrate to be considered for similar opportunities in future?” Or, “How can I grow toward that level from where I am today?”

This turns disappointment into information. If the process was weak, we learn something about the organisation. If the reasoning was sound, we gain a clearer development path.

In startups and small teams, growth is not only about who gets promoted next. It is also about whether people understand how capability, timing, and business need shape opportunity. And many of us later discover that building internal talent is essential, but not always fast enough for every challenge a growing company faces.